Electric Bill Update and Self-Hatred

Happy Labor Day to all my US Friends!  I thought I would give you an update on my electric bill experiment.

As you might recall, back in late July I received a whopper of an electric bill (for me) at $191.  I had been basking in keeping my thermostat at a low temp and enjoying the cool air conditioning.  I decided to do a one month experiment to see how low I could get my electric bill.  I started only burning lights in room I was in, and burning one light instead of two.  Again, I live in a 4 room, 1100 square foot house so this was not a problem.  I also turned my daytime AC setting up to 80 and my nighttime setting to 76 (had been 76 days and 72 nights).  I'll admit that several times, mostly while cleaning the house, I would get hot enough to manually lower the temp a couple of degrees for a few hours but mostly I stuck with the plan.

I received my bill again in late August and IT WAS $2 MORE than the previous month.  I allowed myself 5 minutes of venting to the cats and then sat down to do the math.  The previous bill was for 30 days.  The new one was for 31 days.  And it was extremely hot during the month so presumably the AC had to work harder to keep the house at 80.  For my July bill my average daily useage was $6.36/day.  For the August bill I lowered it by 0.14/day and it was $6.22/day.  This amounted to a 2.2% drop, which amounted to $4.34 less per month. 

For me this isn't a significant enough change to warrant being just slightly uncomfortable.  If I had to cool a bigger multi-level house and was dealing with a bill twice that amount I think it would make a difference. 


For the past 12 months I've been doing a lot of beating myself up about the debt I'm carrying.  For the past 15 years I have lived well within my means, certainly using my credit (mostly for home improvements) but paying it off within a few months.  In late 2007 I was actually completely out of debt.How did I let this happen?

I took 2 hours to go back through statements and I made a list of the expenses I charged because they were too large for my monthly cash flow to handle:

1.  2 root canals, 2 dental extractions, one crown and one bridge in one year, all in excess of my annual dental insurance limit. 

2.  $2500 above what was covered by insurance to replace a storm damaged roof.  This constituted mostly an upgrade from 15 year to 30 year shingles and I believe it was a sound investment in my home.

3.  About $6,500 to redo a small bathroom because of black mold and also because the floor was falling in.  I believe this was also a sound invenstment in my property.

4.  $1500 for emergency treatment for a cat with extreme breathing difficulties over this past 4th of July weekend.  When I adopted her as a rescue I made the committment that I would give her the best care possible.  This was a no brainer.  I absolutely will always make sure my cats receive the care they need because that is the responsibility I took on when I brought them into my home.

Now I'll admit there was some retail therapy in there.  During this period I spent 5 months in Santiago and 1 month in London on business and I did do some shopping but that was minor stuff that would have been paid off in a few months.

The thing I neglected to do was get out of denial about the economy.  Every with the large credit cards charges for my health, essential repairs to my home, and essential care of my cat, I should have been able to pay all of this off within a couple of years.  But I kept living within my 2006 means even as the economy tanked.  Lesson learned.  For a couple of years I kept watching the news and saying "Thank God that hasn't touched me" when in fact it WAS touching me.  I neglected to begin immediate cutbacks, and this was a mistake.

I also put a bunch of eggs in one basket.  I was so sure that once a formal review of my job responsibilities happened my company would realize the immense effort and personal sacrifices I've made and would give at least a small salary increase.  And I assure you that there have been immense efforts and personal sacrifices made.  But this was not to be, and in today's economy I am fortunate to have a job, and a job that I love, no less.

So I've decided to stop beating myself up.  I've buckled down and cut back and I'm tackling this debt one month at a time.  It took me 4 years to build it up and by my estimates it will take me 4 years to get out but I'm doing it.  I can stand anything for 4 years.  I mean, I was married to a man I couldn't stand for 2 years.  This is easy in comparison!

Next installment:  How I gave myself the raise I needed and improved my health at the same time.

Charitable Giving

Charitable giving is the one thing no one should give up.  And if you aren't doing it, start now!  It feels good, and someday you might be in a position where you depend on others to give.

I lost a friend last Monday.  I didn't know him - he was one of those friends of a friend on Facebook.  I saw his posts for about a year and finally, several months ago, I friended him.  Michael was irreverant, with a brilliant wit.  Very few days went by when he didn't post something truly off-color on my wall and make me laugh out loud.  Michael was one of those people who "got" you from day one, and could see where the line was, and spent his time going right up to it but never crossing it.  Not many people have that kind of sense.  I have family who don't get me.

So last Monday I started seeing posts about Michael finally ending his journey.  I immediately contacted a friend because I thought it was one of his pranks, but I found it disturbing, and I wanted the backstory.  Michael truly had passed away.

Michael had ALS (Lou Gehrig's Disease).  And I didn't even know.   He was in a wheelchair, unable to swallow or breathe on his own, unable to speak.  But because of the ALS Association and the technology and hospice care they made available he was active and in touch up until 48 hours before he died.

So Tuesday, after the initial tears, I decided the only thing was to take action.  I'll be walking in the October 22 ATL Walk to Defeat ALS.  I've set a fundraising goal of $1,000, and thanks to the generosity of friends I'm now just over halfway to my goal.  A couple of people have given $100, a few have managed $50.  Most are in the $10 - $25 range. 

My point is:  You don't have to give a lot.  And if you have $10 or $5 or even $1 to give to a good charity that does good things there is no reason to feel that you aren't doing enough.  Just GIVE!

If you truly can't give money, give time.  Do a walk, and use the power of social media to raise funds!  Use the wonderful, capable body you were given, and make a difference in the world.  Donate blood!  It doesn't hurt.  I promise.  Register as a bone marrow donor.  For goodness sake make sure you are an organ donor!  Here in my state this is connected to your driver's license, and the renewal fee is even discounted if you indicate that you want to be one. 

I would have given Michael my marrow, or a kidney, or a portion of my liver if it would have kept him around to make me laugh.  He was truly one in a million, and the world is a shade darker without him.

Conspicuous Consumption

We all do it to some extent.  The key is to identify where you're doing it and then CUT IT THE HELL OUT!

I am always amused to read most advice from the experts about cutting back.  David Bach's "Latte Factor" comes to mind.  His advice is to cut out one trip to Starbucks per day to save something like $1000/year.  I don't go to Starbucks anyway.  It's COFFEE, people.  You can spend $30 on a perfectly fine coffemaker that will last you 10 years and then buy whole bean coffee and grind it in the store yourself for $7/pound and I assure you it's a perfectly good cup of coffee. You could even spring for an expresso/latte machine and you would still be saving.  Admit it.  What you want is for someone to make you feel important.   I hate Starbucks more than Walmart.  Walmart certainly is hell, but they offer products people really NEED at a very low price.  Starbucks INVENTED a "need" and have sucked money out of people who have bought into the bullshit.  I don't need a barista who remembers my name and writes smiley faces on my cup to make me feel important.

OK, PER DAY?!?!?!  Are there actually people who go to Starbucks more than once a day? 

Again, this is fucking COFFEE.  COFFEE, people.  Get a fucking clue.

I have a coffemaker.  It was $23 on sale.  I spend about $14 a month on whole beans that I grind in the store.  I can set my coffeemaker to start brewing 10 minutes before I get up in the morning.  I can drink coffee all freaking morning IN MY JAMMIES for pennies.

If you go to Starbucks every day you better have 12 months of living expenses in a savings account that you don't touch ever.  If you have children you also better have four years worth of college expenses in a different savings account for each one.  If you have this and still go to Starbucks every day I need to NEVER EVER hear you whine about not having enough money. 

So back to the original topic.  CUT IT OUT!  A very long term friend of mine is a freelancer in the film industry.  She makes well in excess of $100,000 per year.  She has a pattern of receiving a check and spending it.  On guitars and keyboards (she doesn't play but wanted them in the house so if someone visited and wanted to play they were there).  On stupid shit like Hello Kitty crap.  On eating out every night because cooking something in her own well equipped kitchen is such a chore.  She has no 401(k).  She has no savings account.  When work doesn't come in she sells her miscellaneous crap on ebay to get through.  I earn half what she does.  I put 13% into my 401(k).  I put $50 per paycheck into a long term savings.  I have my debit card set up to put $1.00 into short term savings every time I swipe it.  And I've several times offered to lend her a few thousand to get her out of the mess she's in.  NOT RIGHT.

STOP SPENDING.  Every damned penny saved is a penny earned.  Last December I got rid of my landline.  For several years the only calls I got were from politicians and telemarketers.  I was paying $20 a month to keep the ringer turned off.  Do you really need 450 TV channels?  I miss my Travel Channel so much but so much of TV can be seen online for free only minutes after it airs.  I cut out cable in 2005.  I'm still alive. 

I eat nutritious, fresh food.  I want for nothing.  I have six damned cats who all have regular annual vet visits.  YOU CAN DO THIS TOO!  Just cut out the crap.

On Debt

Credit is a necessity.  You have to have it.  Unfortunately, it's far too easy to let it get out of hand.  This is the position I find myself in now.  I am making my monthly payments on my 3 major credit cards, and in excess of the minimum, but I'm just not comfortable with the amount of debt I'm carrying.

This is not the result of negligence or irresponsibility by any means.  It's because, since 2008, I've had several very expensive unplanned for "emergencies," and they have had to go on credit.  I'm talking one year where I had so much dental work (root canals, extractions, crowns, bridges) that I exceeded my covered annual limit.  BAM.  $2000.  Then my roof had to be replaced due to storm damage.  Yes, it was covered by my homeowners insurance, but I upgraded the quality of the shingles to 30 year, and there was underlying damage to some wood that wasn't covered.  BAM.  $2500.  Last year I discovered black mold in a bathroom that desperately needed to be redone anyway.  I called in a contractor to give me an estimate and he discovered that the floor was also falling in.  They had to tear it out down to the crawl space and rebuild it.  BAM.  $5000 for the demo/construction plus an additional $1500 for new fixtures/paint, tile, etc.  In July this year Camille had breathing difficulties over the holiday weekend and had to go to the emergency vet clinic.  BAM.  $1600.  In a nutshell it has added up and added up faster than I can keep it paid off.

So I have a plan.  I think a plan is crucial.  It's one thing to accept that you're carrying too much debt but without a PLAN there's no way out.  I now know exactly how I will pay it off.  I know exactly how much I am going to pay on each card every month.  Barring any additional emergencies I know I will have the two highest interest rate cards paid off in 20 months.  This will leave one card to pay off (the lowest interest rate but highest balance) and once the others are paid off I think I can get that one under control in 18 months.

So where am I going to find the fundage to do this?  Stay tuned!

The Electric Bill

I live in Georgia. It gets really hot in the summer. The first two years I lived in this house there was no central air conditioning. It was terribly unpleasant. Luckily there are about 2 months in the spring and 2 months in the fall when neither heat nor air conditioning is necessary, at least not constantly. The other 8 months I'm paying either GA Power or GA Natural Gas far more than I would like.


My last electric bill was $191. I decided it was time to cut back, and I'll share some of what I'm doing.

1. Install a programmable thermostat. I just installed one of these about 2 years ago and I love it. I especially love it on cold winter mornings. I got a cheapo model, about $45. It has already paid for itself.


2. Turn down your water heater! Most folks have their water heater set far higher than is necessary.


3. Ceiling fans. I have ceiling fans in every room. Now, it might seem counterintuitive to install something that runs on electricity in order to lower an electric bill but they do. Hot air rises, cool air falls. Running ceiling fans in the winter keeps the heat distributed. Running them in the summer supplements the AC. Once a week turn them off and dust the blades! The blades pick up an extraordinary amount of dust and dirt. Regularly cleaning this off will keep them running at peak performance. Also, ceiling fans have a switch allowing you to change the direction of the rotation. This should be done seasonally. In the summer the direction should be counterclockwise. In winter change this so the fan runs clockwise.

4. Turn the thermostat up/down by 2 degrees. My personal rule of thumb is that between outdoor temps of 60 and 80 my windows are open. Kind of stupid that I'm OK with 80 when the windows are open and yet I need to have my AC set at 74, right? So little by little I've changed my thermostat. My daytime setting is now 80, and I have it set to go down to 77 at night for comfortable sleeping. I'll admit that will seem a bit extreme to some but I've honestly gotten used to it already. It isn't so bad. If I'm cleaning or if I get on the treadmill I'll do a temporary override and turn it down for an hour or so but 80 is just fine, and with the ceiling fans running it is mostly quite comfortable. I'll revisit my heat settings when the cool weather sets in but I think I can shave a couple of degrees off there as well. I like it a bit on the cold side anyway.


5. Use your curtains and blinds! Don't just open them in the morning and close them at night. I have one bedroom window where the sun just beats in for a couple of hours every afternoon and if I don't close the blinds during this time period it can get quite hot in there.


6. Lights. This is a hard one for me. I live in a very small house. I firmly believe in decorating with light. Especially in the winter I love keeping at least one lamp on in each of my 4 rooms. It makes it cozy and warm and welcoming. I've put a bit of a lid on that. I don't sit in the dark by any means but unless I'm in the room the lights are off. I've replaced the bulb on each of my outdoor lights with CFLs. I will gradually do the same inside as the incandescents burn out.


7. "Ghost" electricity pigs. Unplug your chargers unless you are actively charging something! If you have power strips turn them off at night and when you are away! I realized a few months ago that my TV has a switch. Even when the TV is off, unless the switch is also off it continues to use power. I haven't yet gotten in the habit of turning that switch off at night so I've put a post it note on my bathroom mirror to remind me.

So these are some of the things I'm doing to save in the utility department. I'll get my power bill in the next couple of weeks and I'll be interested to see if these efforts have made a difference. I'll let you know.

Why Frugal?

Well, duh. Unless you've been living under a rock since 2008 you know why. Unemployment hovers around the 10% mark, especially here in GA. Gas prices are out of control. Prices rise but salaries don't.





My personal story: I started with my company as a temp in December, 2002 after having been unemployed for 5 months. It was the worst 5 months of my life, especially coming on the heels of a divorce. My self-esteem was non-existant. I knew that I was nothing but trash. I borrowed $3000 from my parents to make it through and to make sure the divorce was final. In September, 2003 I was hired permanently and refinanced my house in accordance with the divorce agreement - a full 9 months before I had to. My ex was paid $21,500 for sitting in this house and smoking pot and watching me put sweat equity into it for 2 years while he watched TV. I still have no earthly idea how the court arrived at that figure. I hope he's choking on it and I fully believe in karma.





But I digress.





I've now worked for my company for 8 years. I started as an invoicing person and in 3 months was promoted to a buyer. Less than a year later I was asked to go to Tokyo and I thought this was an excellent investment in my future. While I was in Tokyo for a year my company was sold to a corporate conglomerate. I continued to do whatever was asked of me regardless of personal sacrifice. I traveled for months on end to countries where I did not speak the language and somehow managed to thrive, always knowing that eventually my efforts would be recognized in the form of a fair and equitable raise in salary.





It was not to be. After many phone calls and emails I had a salary review (started in April, 2010 and finalized in February 2011) and oddly enough I am exactly at "market value." Like a cut of fucking meat. How convenient. Also I've had 5 "titles" in the past 5 years. I've been A Project Administrator, Project Manager, Program Manager . . . all of which have searchable salaries on the internet, and all of which have salaries exceeding mine in my location. And now I'm a "Senior Project Analyst" which, oddly enough, is a title there is NO SALARY INFORMATION FOR WHATSOEVER. Hmmmm.





I love my job. Truly I love it. I love what I do and I love the people I work with and so "it is what it is." I've revamped my resume and I could start a job search but frankly I've worked a load of jobs and this is the only one I've ever loved. I know I'm worth more. Not a huge amount more, but I know I'm worth more. And yet, since I love my job, and since I've had 2 tiny salary increases in 8 years that haven't even covered the cost of living increase I've had to find it within myself to cut back so I can continue doing what I love.





With two tiny salary increases in the past 8 years my take home is far less than it was in 2004. Our "contribution" to our health insurance increases every year, even as the benefits are reduced. I've managed to increase my 401(k) contribution to 13% when by now it should be at least 17%, if not 20%. When I started, gas was $1.02/gallon. Now it's $3.50 (as of today in GA). My electricity, gas, home insurance, water . . . all have increased substantially. But not the salary.





That said, I am thankful I am employed. I am thankful that I support myself. I have a small list of "want" items. For instance, I "want" a new bed. My bed is 10 years old and it was the very cheapest thing I could afford when I divorced and my ex took the bed. It was better than sleeping on the floor. So, yes. I want a new bed. I "want" to replace the carpet in my "study." None of this is necessary right now. I am able to feed myself with nutritious, good food. I am able to pay my $659/month mortgage. I am able to provide for my feline family and make sure they have their annual vet visits. I am RICH compared to so many and I have nothing to complain about!





And so I have found ways to be frugal. And so these are things I will share in coming posts.

Time To Resurrect The Blog

It has been two years since I dropped my blog altogether, and I thought it was about time to resurrect it. So what have I been doing?

I've been working on my home (as usual). I've been working in my yard (as usual). I will catch up on posting about these projects and will make sure I post some photos.

My last work travel was in September/October 2009 when I spent a month in London. It was incredible.

I'm not sure where the blog is going. First and foremost on my mind these days is finding ways to be more frugal, and I'll be posting quite a bit about this topic since I think it's something on everyone's mind.

Last year I started formally indulging my love of cooking, and I am now a volunteer assistant at a local business that holds cooking classes. I started canning last year and I now count this among my favorite activities. I'll be blogging quite a lot about cooking and canning. I think it goes along with the frugal thing.

And, of course, there will be cats. My feline family is now up to 6. One is, I hope, a foster. I need to find her a permanent home where she can be an only cat.

So. Hi again, y'all! I'm looking forward to this! I'll admit that Facebook diverted my attention for a few years and while I still enjoy that it isn't the same kind of outlet that a true blog is.

Are any of you still out there? Please comment if you are.

Snail Mail

I am on a specific mission this year. Since the internet age the tradition of sending Christmas cards has gone in the can. It is so lovely to receive a Christmas card so I am trying - one woman at a time - to revive this.

Send me your snail mail address and you will receive a Christmas card from me. Nothing special, just a Christmas card.

Yes I suck. As sister Susannah pointed out this morning IN ALL CAPS on facebook - I have not been updating my blog. Keep in mind please - this was my first ever solo flight project that I was responsible for by myself (with huge support from so many people otherwise I would have died I am certain). Every free moment I had was spent working with the exception of 2 1/2 weekend days out of 6 that I did NOT work and actually went out and saw things and took pictures. Looking back on my expense report I see I did get out of the hotel a few times but mostly had dinner via room service while working. Also I like sleeping a lot - preferably 7-8 hours a night but even this was impossible and I was doing maybe 5 tops. So if it came down to updating the blog or sleeping I'm afraid sleep won out.

I've just loaded my photos onto the hard drive and I really WILL work out a post which hopefully will show and tell you about the wonderful things I saw during my month in London.

From London

I decided I wasn't going to start posting again until I really had something to say. Well get ready because I arrived in London today. I'll be here a month training staff here. I've already taken a few photos of my accommodations (before I collapsed) and will be posting and filling you all in within the next couple of days.

If there are any of you still out there. . .

No possible title to this one

There is some family stuff going down now.

The step-father of my sister's husband chose suicide this past week. I think this is the coward's way out and yet I understand the deep pain that would lead to this. As I understand it he slit his wrists and then his own throat.

Sorry to be away so long and then come back with this.

I have been though some deep and very dark times and never could do this to the people I love but I can not pass judgement on a man I met once.

Life is hard. But life is always worth getting through the hard times.

I just don't understand.

"Program" Update

It's a cloudy rainy Sunday here so I thought I would post a program update.

I've been off my exercise for a few weeks. I stopped because I was having some pretty severe tooth issues with a back molar and every time I got my heart rate up it would throb. Also I was on painkillers and painkillers + treadmill = recipe for disaster. It ended up that the tooth was fractured and beyond repair so it had to come out. Of course I was then 2 weeks out of the habit and so didn't even attempt to work out last week but tomorrow I am back on it and thinking that I will add a little strength training to my routine.

I still can't believe I posted my starting weight for the world to read since it is such a great source of shame and embarrassment for me. It does make it that much sweeter to be able to report that I have almost reached the 30 pound mark. As of this morning I am down to 173. My original plan was to get to 135 by June 30 (my b-day) and that absolutely is not going to happen but it does not discourage me in the least. I hit a very frustrating LONG plateau where I bounced around the same 4 pounds for weeks on end but I broke it and now am making progress. If I don't hit another plateau I might be able to make 160 by June 30 which would thrill me.

I am starting to feel comfortable in my own skin again and I am certainly feeling more comfortable in clothing. To be able to reach in my closet and have unlimited choices there is so great. My neighbor Glenna goes on and on about it and even my vet noticed and commented. I am determined that I will NOT purchase any new clothing until I reach my goal. Fortunately since I work from home this is not an issue. Shorts and t-shirts suffice and lord only knows I have enough jeans in various sizes that I can ditch my "fat" jeans (I can take them off now without unzipping them!) and still have options. These "fat" jeans were tight and very uncomfortable at Christmas. This is TMI I am sure but I have this very pretty Victoria's Secret bra that I have only worn once. When I wore it I got raised welts because it was so tight (don't even ask why on earth I would buy something that didn't fit). It now fits!

I still think the key (for me at least) is NOT to "diet." I am just making healthier choices and reducing my portion size a bit. The exercise is the magic bullet and I am looking forward to getting back to it in the upcoming week. This is a lifestyle change and not a quick fix so the fact that it is taking longer than I had anticipated is OK. Sure I would love to turn 47 all trim and svelt and with Michelle Obama arms but I'll take the slow and steady route and be happy knowing I am doing very good things for myself!

Checking In

Hi y'all! I thought it was time I checked in. I've been more interesting in doing than in blogging lately!

We've been enjoying quite a lot of rain here in the Atlanta area. After many years of extreme drought we are finally getting much needed moisture and I am so glad I did the extreme yardwork because it looks gorgeous and things are growing like crazy.

Part of my yardwork was clearing out the old pots under the deck. They had been there for years and in fact I had forgotten they were there. I recycled the old plastic ones and scrubbed the terracotta ones and then planted them with petunias, geraniums, basil and 3 varieties of hybrid tomatoes. I have my fingers crossed that the tomatoes do well. One of them already has blossoms! I also have two old fig trees in the upper backyard but haven't harvested anything for years because frankly I couldn't get to them. Now I can and they are thriving and I expect a good fig harvest if I can get to them before the birds do.

And speaking of birds - I am loving having a yard full of them. I have a lot of finches and cardinals but also several varieties of woodpecker and recently a rose-breasted grosbeak couple! I have started buying high quality birdseed at Wild Birds Unlimited but have been frustrated because about half the bag goes to the squirrels. So last week when I drove out to pick up my monthly 20 pounds bag I also spent too much money on a new feeder called the "Squirrel Buster." After one week I know for a fact it will pay for itself before the end of the year. It truly has proven to be 100% squirrel-proof! It has also been a source of great amusement as I watch the squirrels try to outwit it! My excuse for shelling out the dough? I saw something on the news about credit card companies closing down accounts that go unused for a period of time. I have not used my Discover card in almost a year and it has been sitting there with a zero balance. If they closed the account it would really hit my credit score. So being a financially responsible person I used it to buy my feeder and seed! Yaaaaaayyyyy ME!

On a totally unrelated note - I made a resolution in January to USE UP every half used product under my bathroom sinks before purchasing anything additional. For some odd reason I always travel with my own soap, shampoo, etc. and yet I feel the need to take what is provided by the hotels, drag them back home, and store them in my bathroom cabinets. Can I just say that I have not purchased soap or shampoo in 5 months! And I still have probably enough to last me the rest of the year! So I am being frugal AND decluttering!

I promise that more yard photos are coming - I'm just waiting for some lupines and astilbe to come up first.

Hope everyone is enjoying a wonderful spring!

Happy Easter/Passover/Saturday!

Time to catch up again.

The yard work has continued as it has been possible around the unusual amount of rain we have had here. The rain is very good because we have been in a drought for about the past umpteen years but it makes for difficult times in terms of yardwork so I've picked and cut and pulled as I can.

Most exciting for me is that I have identified 4 holes in my pond liner and patched them. Still not holding water but holding more water than it was before and so I continue my patching. It is a pain but less of a pain than moving all the granite blocks and re-homing the one little goldfish and certainly $10 worth of liner patch is much better than $125 or $150 worth of new liner although I can only put that off for another couple of years.

I continue to work out and in the past 10 days harder than ever. I use a Polar heart rate monitor when I work out to get the most out of my efforts. Polar has a website and a downloadable tool for their products where you can upload your training sessions and keep track of time, distance, and calories burned based on your weight and heart rate. They also have challenges which are posted by other users. I have recently joined 2 challenges. One is Most calories burned by Sept 4 2009 and I am #5 out of 12 on that one. The other is who can train hardest in April and I am 11 out of 26. Not bad for an old lady up against 18 year old Slovokian men! I've become kind of obsessive about it though. I burn between 600 - 700 calories a day on the treadmill and the competitor in me wants to do 3 or 4 sessions a day so I can WIN but I just don't have it in me.

On an entirely unrelated note I have a recipe for all bird lovers out there. I love my backyard birds and I keep them in really good birdseed and suet cakes. Suet cakes can get pricey though so I searched the innernets and found a recipe:

2 cups yellow corn meal
1/2 cup el-cheapo crunchy peanut butter
1/2 cup flour
1/2 cup bacon grease (you can use store bought lard but not as good - the bird go apeshit over the bacon grease. I have several friends saving it for me.)

I also add other crap that is going bad in my pantry. Once I added stale Rice Krispies. A few times I have ground up old nuts (almonds, walnuts) that I once would have tossed. Recently I found dried mealworms at Wild Birds Unlimited and added them to my last batch. You can also add cheap birdseed to fill it out. This is actually "spreadable" which means you can spread it on a tree or throw it on the ground or whip up a hanging block of wood and spread it on that. I have seen birds watch me come out with the container and by the time I get back inside they are all OVER the feeder.

Update on Princess: We continue to deal with her "issues." She still does not want to be picked up but she now will get on the sofa and if I stay very still she will rest her front paws on my leg and sit for a moment or two. She is a sweet girl and totally belongs in this family. She now plays with Mackie and is beginning to play with Phoebe. She lived in a garage by herself for 3 years (when she wasn't in a cage at PetSmart waiting to be adopted) and so she loves looking out the windows at the yard. I love all my cats so much but Princess is a survivor and a tough little cookie and I just adore her and love watching her make progress. I feel enormous guilt that I did not bring her home 2 years before I did but I think she forgives me. She is happy and healthy and it took a while but she managed to land in a great home - MINE!

Life is good.

Pushing Through the Plateau

Y'ALL! I have to blog about this, especially considering my previous post about weight loss and focusing on myself this year. It took me a long time to do that post because I was kind of terrified that I would jinx it all. And after I posted that is exactly what seemed to happen.

For the past 3+ weeks I have been on a plateau. Two pounds down, three pounds up, one pound down, one pound up. I am weighing myself every morning which many "experts" say you should not do but it is what works for me. The past 3 weeks have been utter misery, especially because I was hovering just above my next milestone but could not break it. I was getting on the fucking treadmill religiously but seeing no results. When I was in my 20s I could drop extra weight with little to no effort. Now that I am in my 40s with a hysterectomy under my belt it is HARD!

Last week I decided I had to push through it. I ramped up the treadmill work. I didn't do this by increasing my time but by increasing my average heartrate. I walked faster and even RAN!

Since I began this little journey I have not deprived myself. If I feel like I want a cheeseburger I make myself wait 2 days and if I still want that cheeseburger I go to Burger King. Every now and then I will buy a small bag of chips or a candy bar and then I will make it last. I haven't cut out anything, I've just adjusted my attitude and my portions. But last week I got all drill sargeant on myself. I knew I HAD to see some results if I was to have the incentive to continue getting on the fucking treadmill.

And I did it! After 3 weeks of bouncing around the same 3 pounds I finally got 4 off and it has held! I have broken through my milestone and am well on my way to the next one.

I am so embarrassed to put the numbers out there. But maybe it's time to do it.

I kind of started this back in October/November but only casually - I decided to wait until after the holidays and of course New Year's was the obvious choice. I got terribly sick the first week of January to the point where I couldn't eat and I didn't get started on my plan. When I weighed myself for the first time the second week of January I was 200 pounds. I am sure I was at least a little above that at some point but that was the official starting point. 200 pounds made me officially obese. I didn't want to leave my house. None of my clothing fit and the clothing that did fit didn't feel good on my body.

This morning I got up and weighed and I am at 175.

Y'all know I work from home and my uniform is sweatpants and sweatshirts. In the summer it is shorts and t-shirts. If I leave the house I wear my jeans. I have noticed for several weeks that my jeans are loose, even just out of the dryer. That has made me very happy. It had gotten to the point where even my fattie jeans were uncomfortable but now I can take them off without unbuttoning/unzipping them!

Today our CEO did a global webcast for 90 minutes. It got very dull and I needed to amuse myself but wanted to keep listening so with my bluetooth on I stripped down and started trying on things in my closet.

The cute things that last spring were uncomfortable are now cute! My shoulders and arms look good in them! I have 3 shirts that still have the tags on them. One I bought the yeear I was in Japan (2005) and I have never worn because it was too small. I bought it because it was cute. Now I can wear it! I have 2 shirts (office wear quality) that I bought 2 years ago and have never worn. They were on sale. They now fit and fit well! I have 2 pair of nice khakis that I am within maybe 5 pounds of wearing. I can zip them up but they are still just slightly tight.

I am not yet in my skinny jeans and in fact I did not even try them on today. But I now have a closet full of very nice things that I can wear! When and if I have to travel to the UK for a month I will not need to go out and buy anything unless I lose a lot more weight and all of this is far too small for me.

I have 25 pounds to go before I will consider myself in range. My doc says 150 is where I should be. I think I should be 135 so that means 40 more pounds to go. My goal date is June 30 which is my 47th birthday. If I have to travel to the UK for a month I am sure I will not reach my goal by then but I know now that I can push through.

I wish I loved to exercise. I wish I was the kind of person who woke up and lived for the moment I could start sweating. I am not. But honest to God y'all that is the key. Every day that I force myself to strap on my Polar and get moving is a good day. I hate it - but it makes me feel good. And obviously it is working.

How did I treat myself? I got online and ordered two pair of Crocs! One pair in orange and one in fuscia!

Just wait til I hit 150!

McLovin's Big Night Out

My cats are all indoor cats. We live on a posted 25 MPH street where traffic goes up to 75 MPH and it is just far too dangerous. Sonny is allowed outside on warm sunny days because he is just far too old to jump the back fence. But the rest are strictly indoor. When it is warm enough to have the windows open they have full access to the front screened in porch via my two living room windows which do not have screens. I open the windows and they can come and go as they please.

The front porch is the favorite place for Phoebe and Mac. Camille likes it but she despises the traffic noise and if she hears something loud coming she scoots back in immediately. But Phoebe and Mac I think would be happy to live out there.

Yesterday was a warm day and the windows were open and the cats were on the porch. About dusk it got chilly enough that I had to close up the house and turn on a little heat. I went on the porch without turning on the light and there were no cats there so I closed up and watched a bit of TV and then turned in early to read. I lasted not too long before I turned out the light and fell asleep.

For some reason at 2 am I woke up. I can count on Mac to always be on the bed with me. He might not be there when I get in but without fail he has always been there if I wake up in the middle of the night. He wasn't there last night. I got up for a glass of water and decided to do a head count. They were all ther but Mac was not. I decided maybe I had missed him on the porch so turned on the porch light and went to check. He wasn't there but one of the screens was completely pushed out and torn away from the frame! I panicked.

I put on my shoes and at 2 am went out in the front yard calling him. This is a cat who has never been outside since he was rescued. This is a cat who loves sleeping on his back in the middle of the bed. This is a cat whose favorite activity is to take his play mousies into the kitchen (because the floor is bare vinyl) and chasing them around for hours. This is a cat who is entirely happy living inside. I knew he did not have the street smarts to be outside on his own and I was scared.

From the front I made my way around to the side yard. Calling him I heard a far away meow. It didn't sound like him but it was a meow in response to my calls so I kept walking toward it. My journey took me back around the house into the gate and into the backyard. I kept following it and calling and walking up into the far backyard and all the way to the back fence. To my dismay the meow I heard was coming from far outside the back fence.

I managed to open the back gate which was only recently cleared of ivy and walked into the trolly track easement, still following the weak meow. I know the voice of each of my cats. They each have a very distinct voice. But this was not a voice I recognized. This was a weak and tiny voice. But I kept calling and shining my flashlight and eventually I heard something moving through the leaves and underbrush. I called and called and finally MAC came out of the woods! I grabbed him which he hates and so he struggled with me as I found my way back to the gate and then into the backyard and down to the house.

I inspected him thoroughly and he had no injuries and not so much as a burr on him. He ate a little bit and while I tried to wind down he got in the middle of the bed and fell asleep.

All day I've reminded him of how lucky he and the others are to have such a good home and such a good Mommy who would get up and look for him in the middle of the night. But I am the one who is lucky.

Today I went to Home Depot and got a huge roll of screen and tomorrow I will fix the damaged area and do regular patrols for anything that needs to be replaced. Until that happens the porch is a restricted area!

Princess

I'm coming clean here. 8 weeks ago I adopted yet another cat.

I am not a "collector." My absolute upper limit is 5 cats. I can provide for 5 cats and make sure they receive excellent care. I am pretty sure that I could not add a sixth and provide excellent care so 5 is my limit.

Princess had a very sad story. She is 3 years old. A no-kill rescue organization saved her from a county shelter 2 1/2 years ago just before she was to have been euthanized. This organization brings cats in to my local PetSmart every Saturday from noon - 6 pm for adoption and I first saw Princess there just after she was rescued 2 1/2 years ago. I fell in love with her immediately and I wanted to bring her home with me but my job-buzz told me I would be going to South America "any day now" and I could not justify bringing a new cat in only to leave for months on end. So I didn't bring her home and I also stopped going to PetSmart on Saturdays. My bleeding heart could not take it.

A few times since then I have, out of scheduling and necessity, ended up at PetSmart on a Saturday and Princess was still there. I tried to ignore it and tried to not feel guilty. In January I ended up there again on a Saturday and Princess was NOT THERE!!! I got so excited and I approached the woman in charge of the adoptions and mentioned that I was so HAPPY that Princess had found a home! She told me Princess had not found a home but had developed a bad enough case of cage-rage that she was now considered "unadoptable" and was living in this woman's garage with virtually no human contact. They were thinking about having her put to sleep to end her misery.

I told her to BRING ME THE CAT!!!! As long as I have space for another there is no such thing as an "unadoptable" cat.

Princess came home with me in mid January. For the first 2 weeks she pretty much stayed under the bed and anyone who made the mistake of walking in the bedroom got an earful of growls and hisses. It was like there was a 200 pound satanic troll living under my bed and we were all slightly scared. I began to think I had made a very bad decision.

Then one night I woke up in the middle of the night and Princess was on the bed pressed up against me. I stroked her and talked to her and she let me and I heard her purr for the first time. And ever since she has made huge progress.

She now actually lets me pick her up from time to time for a minute or so. She is learning to trust me and every day I work with her on trust issues. She has made fast friends with her brothers and sisters. She is very protective of me and if she hears something outside she will run to the window and growl. She is learning so fast and has made the most remarkable progress.

Princess had her first visit to Dr. Aponte Friday for her rabies shot and annual exam and I warned them that I could not be certain about how she would behave. She ended up behaving like a true Princess and I was so proud of her! I told them her story and Dr. A came around the exam table and hugged me. It seems she has been very disheartened lately with clueless pet "owners" and the staggering increase in abandoned pets due to the economy and she told me Princess's story made her week.

No cat should ever be tagged as "unadoptable." Given a bit of love, space and patience nothing is impossible.

More Yard Progress and PI

More progress was made over the past week. I was able to get out Thursday and Friday afternoons last week for an hour or so and several hours each Saturday and Sunday. 24 more bags on the street come Monday pickup.

A few before and after shots to show the huge progress.

The area around the magnolia before:

And after:

Between the shed and deck before (primo snake area):
And after:

The way upper backyard before:

And after:

In addition to hurting (I cannot make a fist and find things as simple as picking up a small object are almost impossible) I have major poison ivy. I did not see poison ivy but something poison was in all that rootage I pulled out of the ground because my forearms are like hamburger meat and the left side of my face makes me look like I'm dating Chris Brown. I am so serious. It is bad.

You will not often hear me say something like this but thankfully some cooler, rainy weather is moving in tonight which should give me a chance to heal before the next bout of yardwork comes around.

This is such a huge accomplishment. There is still so much detail work to be done but that is easy stuff in comparison.

Extreme Yardwork

I have a rather big backyard. It has always been rather "natural" (not landscaped) but I try to keep it maintained. Lots of trees means lots of raking. Because the back of my lot is against the old trolley track easement owned by the city, and because the city does not maintain this area, I have always had an ivy problem. As long as I keep it cut back everything is OK but if a year goes by and I don't do maintenance it becomes a problem.

So I realized that the last time I did any kind of maintenance back there was spring 2004, and not a great deal that year. Let me 'splain.

2004: I re-did my bathroom and had my chimney rebuilt from the roofline up. Then I went to the Caribbean in July where I ruptured both Achilles and was in a wheelchair for 8 weeks.

2005: I was in Japan the whole year.

2006: I had a hysterectomy in the spring and it took quite a while to fully recover. Hard yardwork not really an option.

2007: I was here, I was healthy, and I managed to get a little bit done but was working mainly in the areas directly outside the house. Since these areas had been ignored so long that was a huge undertaking.

2008: I was in Chile.

The key is that all this work needs to be done in the early spring. By Memorial Day the heat in Atlanta is too much to be doing more than simple upkeep. Also there is the snake factor. I hate snakes. I am terrified of snakes. If I am mowing the yard and I see a snake I stop immediately and go inside and leave the mower where it is. If it gets stolen I don't care. This is how much snakes terrify me. So upper backyard work MUST be accomplished prior to snake weather.

We had a couple of lovely warm weekends in February and I got started. I don't have full "before" photos but I do have a few that will give you an idea.

This area beside the shed was a mess - ivy, blackberry vines, leaves, debris, vines on the fence . . . This is where I started.

I raked the lower backyard thoroughly and cleared all the dead planting stuff from around the pond.

To orient you - the tree in the center of the above photo is a huge magnolia. Magnolias have the biggest, toughest leaves. They don't even compost they are so tough. You see the dirt before the patchy grass starts around the pond? The ivy was all the way to there and up into the magnolia tree. I got all of that cleared.

Since I began in February and as of this morning I have put 43 Lowe's bags on the street PLUS all the branches I've picked up. I have in my possession 22 empty Lowe's bags and fully intend to have them all filled before the weekend is over.

After all this work and all these bags what could I possibly have left to do you ask?

Just this.

And that.

I'll take more photos Sunday to show you the progress! I really do think I can get all of this done before heat and snakes move in.

I have a Brit co-worker who, in addition to earning what I am certain is a huge salary (he is one of the top IT people), owns several of his own companies. He lives in a multi-million dollar MacMansion in a swanky neighborhood. He asked me why I don't just "hire a gardener."

Right. I'm going to get right on that. But until then I am thoroughly enjoying being outside on my own property sweating a little.

Back Due to a Sound Spanking

I called Aussie Paul Friday afternoon (his Saturday morning). I had not talked to him in forever and vow to call more often. He is so good about sending me cards and notes and I am so bad at doing this! Aussie Paul seems to be going through a lot of the same things I am so this post is for you my darling Paul!

I have been working on changing my life and this is part of why I haven't posted much in the past couple of months. Paul mentioned that he checks my blog and noted the lack of updates so I promised myself that I would post something this weekend!

For the past 13 years I have been putting people and things much higher on my priority list than my own health and well being. I mulled this over a lot once I got back from South America and in October I began making small changes. In November I decided that 2009 would be the year of ME. That sounds so self-absorbed. Really it isn't. If I drop dead from self-neglect it isn't going to do my company any good.

In 1996 I met my ex and he became my priority. He was extremely high maintenance and I focused every bit of energy I had on him. In 2001 I kicked his miserable ass out and embarked on beginning my recovery. I found a new job (my present one) and put everything into it. I worked the long hours, traveled, and lived far outside my comfort zone which for me was an awakening. I am truly not the person I was even a handful of years ago. The problem was I put job at #1 and this after putting the ex at #1. So I found myself in December looking at a fat, pasty, out of shape, unhealthy person.

I decided to make 2009 the year of ME because it suddenly sank in that I am not getting any younger, I want to live a long and healthy life, and I want to be the best I can possibly be.

I know I have a family history of high blood pressure, high cholesterol and heart problems. This was heavy on my mind when I came back from Santiago after spending 6 months eating every meal in restaurants and red meat for practically every meal! I am quite sure I gained at least 20 pounds while there and I was carrying too much weight to begin with. The last cholesterol test I can remember the numbers of was in my late 20s and it was 216 at that time.

I function with lists. If I make a list I can generally tick off the items. If I don't things never are attended to. I knew I needed to begin exercising. I knew I needed to add supplements to my daily routine. So I made a weekly checklist. It's all on there. I print one out every Sunday night and it gets posted on my whiteboard. Every single day, as I do the things I need to do for my own health, I check them off my list.

So here is what I've been doing. At least 4 times a week I get on the treadmill and walk for one hour - 3 miles+. I wear my Polar heartrate monitor which tracks my caloric expenditure which I then upload on the web so I have a diary of my accomplishments week by week. I highly recommend this little device. I want to lose weight but just getting on a treadmill isn't going to do it. It takes me 10 full minutes to get my heartrate up to aerobic zone. With the monitor I can see exactly what I am doing and add to my walking if my heartrate drops below the aerobic zone (increase incline, add light handweights, etc). It allows me to use every second of my hour for maximum bang.

I take a daily multivitamin, 2 baby aspirin, omega 3 fish oil, two tums (for calcium) and red yeast rice to lower my cholesterol. And yes I did take a full list of everything I am taking in to my doctor and got his blessing and praise for what I am doing. I also drink a concoction of 3 tbsp apple cider vinegar with a teaspoon of raw unfiltered honey with 8 ozs of water every day. And I drink at least 2 cups of high quality green tea each afternoon.

Since Christmas, and as of this morning, I have lost 22 pounds. I had a full bloodwork done 3 weeks ago and my cholesterol is at 182 total (HDL is 49 and LDL is 114). All other results are smack dab in the middle of the acceptable range. My attitude is mostly excellent, I have at least twice the energy I did 6 months ago, and rather than sit and worry about my health I feel so good about it!

I still have a way to go. I would like to lose more weight. My doctor and I rarely have differences of opinion. He thinks I should ideally be at 150. I think 140 would be acceptable and 135 preferable. Whatever. What I will NOT do is starve myself or kill myself to get to 135. What I WILL do is continue what I am doing now. I will turn 47 on June 30 and if I can continue to lose 2.5 - 3 pounds a week I will turn 47 at a healthy weight. If I can get to this goal I will get a tattoo. A small, discreet tattoo. I will also buy some decent clothing. For years I have refused to buy clothing because really the next step is Lane Bryant. The day I walk into Lane Bryant is the day I get into bed and refuse to get out.

I also want to get my LDL below 100 and maybe in the bargain raise my HDL a few points. I highly (highly highly) recommend red yeast rice. Note that it must be taken with niacin but the brand I take has the niacin built in. I am certain that I was courting a cholesterol count of at least 230 or 240 by the time I returned from Santiago so to get my results and see 182 was nothing short of amazing for me. I am certain this was due to the red yeast rice.

I do not ever want to have to be on regular medication if this is possible but I am now taking a low dose blood pressure med and hopefully if I can keep up the exercise and good dietary changes I can back off of it in 6 months or a year. I have a BP machine and I monitor myself a couple of times a week to keep track of my progress. I would rather take a pill every morning temporarily than have to hire someone to wipe my ass for the rest of my life.

So there it is. The year of ME. It takes only about 90 minutes a day to add my checklist items to my routine and you know what? I think I am worth 90 minutes a day.